Saturday, September 6, 2008

Top 5

Top 5 Signs that Your Striker May be Cheating On You With Manchester United


5) He's constantly throwing up gang signs in the shape of an "M", and he hasn't been in a gang since a short shank fight he had in middle school as part of his initiation into the Blagoevgrad Young Boys.

4) His preseason goal celebrations consist of him putting his cigarette out of your forehead, immediately taking a seat on the bench, and wrapping himself in a Red Devils scarf.

3) A strange little scouse girl keeps calling during the middle of the day, "Can I tuuchhh to Berbatov, like?". And you keep hearing an arrogant Scottish man in the background yelling.

2) You hear strange moaning sounds coming from his room, and you open the door to find him repeatedly playing and rewinding a Ronaldo cross.

1) He spends the majority of a whole season showing up teammates on the pitch, whining to the press, and generally acting like he was God's gift to football....oh wait.


Maybe if Juande Ramos would have read these little tips, he could have kept his world class Bulgarian striker.

Off Week

Bye, Bye, Keegan, Goodbye
Well, its official now. Keegan has left Newcastle. A wave of supporter pleading could not deter King Kev from stepping down after just 7 months in charge. The situation in Tyneside appears to be more like the Mourinho-Abramovich feud than anything else. Keegan wanted full control over who was brought in, and Mike Ashley and co. brought in two players that he didn't want. Now he has to watch another manager come in and lead his beloved Magpies. It probably won't be Alan Shearer, who has already ripped the Newcastle ownership. Shearer pulled himself out of contention for the job, stating that he wouldn't want to be there with the club's current transfer policy any more than Keegan did.

Reds Injured
Rafa Benitez is claiming that Gerrard and Torres could be back for the Man United match next weekend. Is this just a tactical game to keep Sir-guson on his toes? Or are the pair recovering better than expected?

I think that regardless of their fitness, Liverpool's two most important players should probably sit out. Will our chances of winning or even gaining a draw, decrease dramatically, sure. But further injury could damage the Reds title aspirations.

New signing Albert Riera, with an extra week of initiation into the squad, should get a run out at Anfield against the Red Devils. I really don't want to see Lucas out there on the left again, although if Rafa is being Rafa, the Brazilian will find his way onto the pitch at some point. As will my favorite Spanish pylon Arbeloa......I miss you already Steve Finnan. Riera will look to open things up, and get Robbie Keane on for the first time this season. Hopefully the striker can find the net today against Georgia today, giving him a little confidence going into the Man U game.

Friday, September 5, 2008

WORLD CUP 2010: Qualifying

A look ahead to Saturday's World Cup qualifying matches has most of the power teams in Europe starting off their campaigns against teams that they shouldn't have much of a problem beating. France, begins their qualifying bid in Austria, which is probably the toughest match-up for a big squad. Not that anyone expects a shocking result there.
Two nations that begin their qualifying groups filled with more uncertainty and less expectation than they arrived in Germany with 2 years ago, are the U.S. and England. Both teams have suffered through an identity crisis or two in the past, something I'll touch on in future coverage, and are looking as much to shape their squads as they are looking for results in these first few matches.

U.S.A.
Cuba vs. United States
Saturday, Sept. 6th

The U.S. squad heads into their second qualifying match against Cuba, ranked 28th in the world. A far cry from the excitement in the years leading up to Germany, where they were a top ten squad, at one point just before the WC 2006, reaching 4th in the world. That's right, it really happened, we were 4th in the world, a country laden with xenophobic "soccer" fans and media, trailed only Brazil, the Czech Republic, and the Netherlands. Of course, Fifa's ranking system is pretty ridiculous, as no one ever thought the Americans were the 4th best team in the world, but the expectations had been raised and that was a good thing.

The bad thing was our performance in that World Cup. Outside of a 1-1 draw with the eventual champions Italy, in a game in which the U.S. were hard done by the officials (the Italian team should have all won Oscars or Donatellos or whatever you get in Italy for acting like you've just been assaulted by street toughs), and were the better team, the games were a bust. Our men finished dead last, albeit in the toughest group, but still we were fourth in the world and finished fourth in our group. Landon Donovan's WC performance made Frank Lampard's play in Germany look Zindanish by comparison.

This time around the expectations our lower and our squad is probably more talented. Michael Bradley is developing into a fantastic midfielder and with his move to the Bundesliga, he should be even more tested for tough international battles. Maurice Edu, Clint Dempsey, and Freddy Adu are all playing at a high level in Europe. Oguchi Onyewu is a solid, if inconsistent, center back, and Jozy Altidore's move to Villareal should have him in fine form by 2010. And let's not forget our legion of talented goaltenders, Tim Howard, Marcus Hahnemann, and Brad Guzan.

The Cuba game should be interesting, as it is rare that we go into to Cuba and come out with anything but our tail between our legs (Wow, that joke would've had the CIA at my door in the 1960s). I look for the U.S. to find their feet and grind out victories on the road, until they can find a comfortable and consistent lineup, and gain some real cohesion. Bob Bradley has them going in the right direction though.

England
Andorra vs. England
Saturday Sept. 6th

Every time before a big tournament or during qualifying for one, you will hear a lot of the same thing from the England players. They will talk about how their star players have to come up big on the international stage, how they need to fit into their roles on the squad, and how each time out they need to send a message.

On Saturday, their message sending will be done against the tiny nation of Andorra, in a game that will be played in Barcelona. I recently had a conversation with a friend, while discussing the qualifying match-up, that went something like this......

Friend: So is Andorra in France or Spain?
Me: Neither, it's in Andorra.
Friend: Yeah, but what country surrounds it?
Me: It's in between France and Spain, in the Pyrenees.
Friend: The Pyrenees, what country is that?
Me: Oh boy, mountains, The Pyrenees are mountains.
Friend: Oh cool, so are Andorran people French or Spanish.
Me: Neither, they're Andorran.

I proceeded to tell him that they speak Catalan, but I quickly changed the subject before his head exploded.

I digress, so regardless of whether England beats Andorra 1-0 or 9-0, I don't think that Croatia will be any more or less concerned. What England needs to concern themselves with is the possible absence of Rio Ferdinand, and the definite no-shows, Steven Gerrard and Owen Hargreaves. I believe that Gerrard and Hargreaves should be their central midfielders for 2010, and they'll need them in the squad as much as possible in the next two years.
We hear a lot about players like, Gareth Barry, David Bentley, and Jermaine Defoe needing to shine to hold down a place in the squad. For me, I believe that it's Frank Lampard that should be on his last legs as an England international. He has been dreadful over and over again for his nation. Okay, 14 goals in 62 caps is not bad statistically, but he has disappeared in every single big match he has had for England. I think that this first half of the WC qualifiers should be his last chance to impress Capello.

And I know it has been said a million times, but he plays a similar attacking style to Stevie G (without those pesky 40 yard runs), and is non-existent on the other side of the pitch. Unless you count fumbling tackles and overplaying balls good defense. The two of them cannot coexist and Gerrard is, in my opinion, England's best player. Keeping Lampard as a late goal scoring substitute option would be okay, if he played well for his country, which he hasn't.

The hope is that England can get it together like Spain did this summer, and turn their collection of stars into a team. Maybe West Ham can make qualifying a little easier by prying the outlandish Croatian manager, Slaven Bilic, away from his national team.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Transfer Fallout: Curbishley and Keegan

This just in: the Abu Dhabi group have funded their own Fountain of Youth, and want to pay Pele 400 million pounds to take dip and play for City.

Okay, not so much, but after pledging a ridiculous sum on Ronaldo for January, Manchester City's new owners may not be the biggest story from this summer's transfer period.

The real trouble may rest with the long term fallout from Alan Curbishley leaving West Ham and Kevin Keegan teetering on doing the same with Newcastle. Make no mistake, the tide was already turning for Premier League managers; from a position of large scale control of a club, to just another interchangeable part in the money machine. But now, with Curbishley resigning from the Hammers, and Keegan contemplating his departure from the Toon, it looks as if we have turned the corner on managerial power for good.

This idea has existed in Italy and Spain for some time now. Managers, even those with cup and league winning success, are turned over with the regularity of an oil change on a high performance automobile. Capello left Real Madrid after an inspiring La Liga championship, spurred by star David Beckham, who had fallen out of favor with his manager. Managers in England, however, are associated with their clubs. Sir-guson at Man U, Wenger with Arsenal, even Curbishley at Charlton for all those years.

It is probably that run at Charlton that is blinding Curbishley to the reality of modern football. At his former club, he brought in the players he liked for low costs and built the team he wanted. So what's changed? He has more talent now with West Ham than he had at Charlton.

The difference lies in ownership and the operation of clubs. Curbishley was told when he was hired that West Ham was willing to spend and bring in quality players. Then comes the summer transfer period, West Ham sell two important defensive players and bring no one of note back into the club, violating the reserved manager's trust.

The same has happened at Newcastle. Keegan's reaction to the mid range signings of Xisco and Gonzalez could only mean that he was promised more and didn't get it. This is the situation we are in. Ownership changes hands or restructures their own spending policies with little notice, and taking this as a personal affront, while a natural response, is not a healthy one for a manager.

My criticism is not primarily with ownership, the fault does not all rest in the boardroom. Curbishley and Keegan should know by now that this is modern football. A promise of spending or a warning of prudence means nothing. Managerial positions are not easy to come by in the Premier League and once a manager gets in, he should see that job out. His obligation is to the fans, his squad, and himself.

Are West Ham and Newcastle tied to a mid table finish with the talent that they have, probably. By why not show what you can do with the players you have? Isn't it better to fight for a fifth place finish, than to resign your squad to not winning and give up. How much would Keegan or Curbishley be lauded by media and fans alike if either of their teams made a charge up the table?

I can understand the immediate frustration and anger over being misled by upper management, but I don't understand giving up. Cup victories and the possibility of European play next year should be enough of a goal for these managers. A modern manager should manager his players and their tactics on the pitch, everything else is secondary.

Is it fair? Is it right? Probably not, but it is reality, and stomping away from your team and your fans will not change that fact.